Originally posted on greenfairydotcom
Life is full of difficult decisions.
For example; when a fine, morally upstanding member of the community finds oneself at the blood donation centre in W1, does one dodge, duck and visit the toilet at strategic purposes to ensure that when your turn arrives your blood is taken by the vicious but blessedly silent Hattie Jaques-alike, or does one stall in the hope of getting the nimble-fingered, painfree young man with the teeth-grinding line in unyielding small talk?
Actually, that was possibly a bad example; there is absolutely no question about it. Were I my mother I am sure that by the end of the session I'd know the name of his girlfriend's dog and be arranging to visit at the new year, but I just can't do relentless chatter about what I'm doing at the weekend. Any amount of pain is better than suffering relentless aural papercuts for ten minutes whilst eyeing up the murderous potential of a cupboard full of Leucoflex. He has a brace too, and obviously sees me as a fellow sufferer of orthodontic torments with whom he can generally commiserate and complain to about not having had toffee in eighteen months. He's very fond of toffee, apparently. Can't get enough of the stuff. It's hell it is, not being able to have any. Hell. He still carries his little toffee hammer everywhere with him in his pocket. He likes to feel it every now and again.
What is a genuinely hard choice to make is with whom to place my chirpy order of 'chips, please!' in my local kebab shop. They have two men working behind the counter; no matter what day of the week or time of day I go in, always the same two men. Sometimes of course, one is carving the suspicious spitroasted thing or pouring chilli sauce and you have no option, but quite often you do and this is where it helps to have considered things beforehand. One man wraps chips in a long, thin, conical fashion, and the other is a flat, wide, lotus arrangement. I know. Nightmare.
Do you go for the conical man who, especially in this weather, ensures that your chips are tightly packed and will remain warm all the way home but due to such tight package will mean that all chips from about halfway down will be squodged together in one great lump (nevermind any thoughts of vinegar managing to permeate that far)? Or do your plump for the lotus man, guaranteeing the proper dispersal of applied condiments and loose chip retreval all the way to the end, but risk not getting that far due to chill December winds turning them tepid before you've even reached home?