Originally posted on greenfairydotcom

I have spent the afternoon engaged in market research for fun and profit. Fun, because I like to mess with advertiser's heads and profit because if you pick the slightly delicate assignments you get paid enough for a Agent Provocateur bra (the universal standard by which my finances are calculated). Thus I have been discussing the optimum width of a tampon for the past two hours (Just Wide Enough, in case you were wondering).

It turns out that I have been labouring under a delusion, however. Today I have learnt that contrary to long-held opinion, not all women laugh themselves stupid at blue water being used as a blood substitute in sanitary pad adverts. And in fact, when said water is replaced with a wholly more suitable-for-demonstrative-purposes thicker dark inky substance instead of noting appreciatively the more realistic way it gets absorbed into the special lockaway core, some women turn positively squeamish and shriek "What next? Real poo in nappy adverts?"

I was tempted to say something, but after the reception my requested alternative strapline for maxi pads with wings that involved the words 'gush' and 'brand new white sofa' recieived I decided truth in advertising wasn't really what they were after.